Snackie's World

Snackie Video: The Sweet Sweet Posse Bonus

Sorry about the bad editing...I'm in a hurry, dammit!

Northern California Kisses,
Me

Snackie Radio And The Sunday Blowout!

In case you haven't already heard, I am headed up to spend the weekend with the one and only Jester and his crew!  I could not be more excited than I am right now...hold on, I may pee!  Anyway, I was going to post a video today but I figure that at Jester's house...yah, my ass will be video taped and recorded all weekend long so I will save it for then!  Meanwhile, let's talk about my utter whoredom this weekend.  I am taking over Karl's slot since he is out of town soooo....Snackie Radio will be two hours long.  And although I am a guest on Fab's Radio Show directly after (where the sole purpose is for me to talk TC08), you know it will be a total TC08 free for all on my show too!  I have no real guest star this week so I am really hoping that some of you will call in and fill the gaps, which I know you whores will, right?  Let me know if you'd especially like to be part of the show for sure!

Here's all the information you will need.....

THE TWO HOUR SHOW....LIVE FROM JESTER'S HOUSE!
COHOST - JESTERTUNES / SPECIAL GUEST STARS - ALL OF YOU!!! 
SUNDAY MAY 11TH AT 2PM PACIFIC/5PM EASTERN
CLICK HERE TO GET A REMINDER FOR THE SHOW!
then
CATCH ME ON FABBY'S SHOW, POINTLESS DRIVEL LIVE
WHERE I DISH THE JUCIEST DIRT FROM TEQUILACON!
CLICK HERE FOR THAT REMINDER!

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And now we are back to me being on my hands and knees while begging you to be a guest on my show.  All of you are welcome, even if we've just "met".  There are some people I expect to sign up, dammit!  The available dates are below!

MAY 18TH - THE ONE AND ONLY AVITABLE
MAY 25TH -
JUNE 1ST-
JUNE 8TH -
JUNE 15TH -
JUNE 22ND -
JUNE 29TH -
JULY 6TH -
JULY 13TH
JULY 20TH -  KARL AND HILLY, TOGETHER IN ONE HOUSE!
JULY 27TH - THE SEXY SWEETHEART, MISS BRITT
ANY DATE THEREAFTER -

Sweet Sweet Posse Kisses,
Me

Snackie's Confession Both: Sins Of Spring

Right, I know...we just HAD a confession booth in March and I usually wait about six months.  However, TequilaCon just happened and also spring is in the air so we really need to get some shit off of our chests, right?  Indeedy!  Some of you know and love the Confession Booth posts whereas others of you are "new" to my blog since the last shindig.  Either way, it's all good because I am going to tell you how to play along!  My dirty whorish ass needs this and I hope all of you get a good load off of your shoulders as well.  I like it when a lot of people play, even when they confess silly things, sorta like when Dave confesses that he is awesome.  Uh yeah, duh ;).

You can see previous Confession Booths here, here, here and here! As I do every time, I will now post a snippet that was included in the very first confession booth post so that you know how it all works. 

So I got to thinking.....we need a good old, soul cleansing confessional here in the PRB.  Of course, if you want to talk about crazy things that have major psychological depth, Post Secret always loves to hear from people.  But what about the small stuff? Life's aggravations, accomplishments, random thoughts, and various other things that we never admit to anyone?  

Well, that is where the "Snackie Confession Booth" comes into play!  You are welcome to come here and confess to something, no matter how big or small.  If you want to get real deep and do so anonymously, I won't out you.  If you want to be "yourself" and talk about random stuff that you would just LOVE to confess, dig it....and then do it! 

Everyone is welcome!  In fact, tell your friends to swing by and let a load off of their chests, if only for a moment.  You can confess to one thing, two things or many things and can come by as many times as you like! 

IMPORTANT ADDITION: If you want to comment anonymously, please use a fake email address such as me@me.com and you can use  www.snackiepoo.com  as your URL or it will revert to the one you have used here before!

Little do you know that I often post anonymous comments as well....sometimes I just need to get things out without worrying about prying eyes.  As usual, my confessions will be in comments and I'll agree with half the things you say either cause I am a joiner OR cause I totally "get" you.  Please know that every time one of you comments, I nod my head because I truly understand.

Now...get to confession before your soul can no longer be saved ;).

Hooker Waitress Kisses,
Me

Everybody Wants To Rule The World...

I hate it when people back me into a corner that I have no way of getting out of unless I play by their rules.  Hell, half of the time no one has even sent me the fucking play book, which makes it even more difficult to dance like a the little puppet that they'd like me to be.  And you know, the further you push me into that corner, the less likely you are to get your desired outcome.  I get defensive and push back by kicking you to the curb or I just remain stagnant in silent protest because that's easer for me than being mean.

Well that's a lie.  It's *kinder* when I'm silent.

I tend to get really vocal when I am hurt by or frustrated with someone but when I am actually past the point of clarifying my emotions and reach the boiling point of utter anger, I clam up.  This happened last week when I was basically given an ultimatum, which eventually led to me being shunned because I did not pick wisely, grasshopper.  I'm still pretty pissed.

You shouldn't ask someone to make a choice between you and someone else when they can have both.  For example, let's say that I was going to visit my family for the weekend, mentioned that I'd like to hang out with my friends one of those nights, and got scolded and talked to like a three year old child for wanting to do so.  I was talked down to and guilt-tripped and neither of those things make me smile for miles.  I was so livid that I saw red and decided not to deal with the situation until I was done being angry and could communicate with some semblance of kindness and understanding for the other side.  Then I left for Philly for three days and was too busy to deal with emails and such.

On Monday, even before lunch time, I was informed that my all access pass to FamilyLand had been revoked because I, once again, had not dealt with my own life properly (or the way they wanted me to).  I was told that I needed to make a choice about who was more important to me, my friends or family.  My argument was that there should be no NEED to make a choice when wanting to see friends for a few hours of a total family weekend.  It was brought to my attention today that the whole weekend became about my friends rather than my family, who would like to feel that they are the main focus of my visits.  Well yes, of course it became all about my friends because such a big fucking deal was made over one dinner and rather than me backing down like a milquetoast and just refusing to see people that I only see when I go to Northern California, I held my ground...over one measly dinner.

The drama of this whole thing floors me.  I know for sure that everyone has ideas of what they want their relationships with their family to be like.  I also understand some of the reasons behind feeling disappointed that I did not want to spend every waking moment doing family things..but seriously?  This all went too far.  The fact that I was uninvited because I had not danced like a fucking puppet has my blood boiling.  While some of you think that I probably should have just told my friends to hit bricks and acquiesced to my family's request, go ahead and have that opinion but there is so much back story here that I can't even recount it all.

But know this (something that I did tell my Dad, btw)...my friends and the time I get to spend with them is my safe haven.  Those moments, those parties, those meetings, those dinners...they are the only times I feel safe enough to let my guard completely down.  I need them in order to survive some other parts of my life.  Also, people who know me also know that I have been somewhat of a flake upon occasion and I promised myself to knock that shit off.  It ties in with my post yesterday...so now you know the reason.  I had flaked on a lot of people because I was embarrassed to be fat.  But I decided to get over it and go see friends when I said I would and blah blah blah, whine whine whine.

The point here is....nothing really.  I guess I just can't back down from this one.  Ironically, I'm going to be spending the weekend in the bay area at Jester's house anyway so I will still be seeing my friends.

FooDiddy Kisses,
Me

You Make Me Want To Be A Better (Wo)Man...

I was thinking about doing another TequilaCon wrap-up post that was chock full of amazing and amusing anecdotes but it seems like I've already peed my pants about five times tonight reading everyone else's posts.  So I tell you what...I'll get my gibberish out of the way then link you to a magical world of crazy drunken antics.  Oh and I mean "fucking certifiably crazy".

But before that, I'd like to bring myself to a mellow and talk about some of the more emotional aspects of this weekend as I am often prone to do.  Unbelievably, between the booze, boobie shots, hiding from Karl's flashing, constant twattering and other fun sightseeing things....I learned a lot about myself.  In fact, I think I was so busy cultivating my guts that I forgot to take pictures...I have a few of the pre-con but that's really it.  But anyway, let's talk innards....

I hate being this fat.  I'm actually working on it and was starting to lose weight right before leaving for Philly but obviously not enough to take away the extra pounds gained from last year before the big day.  So no matter how many of you want to roll your eyes at me and tell me to shut the fuck up, I'm just being honest.  There was a genuine worry on my part that feeling that way about myself would affect me more than the actual weight itself so I tried really hard to just get over it and let my light shine.  I think I did a pretty good job of it.  It's easy around this specific group of bloggers because not one of them, that I know of anyway, was even phased by that shit.  So I don't really want to dwell on that aspect too much except to say that for some reason, while super fucking drunk, it did.

I was a little lost for awhile at TequilaCon, not really knowing who to talk to...not because I had no one to talk to but because there were so many great people that I felt a bit overwhelmed.  Yes, the secret is out...even extroverts can often feel like hiding in the corner for five quiet minutes.  I went outside to "make out" a lot (our code for smoking) because most of the people I know really well smoke and it was sort of a mini haven at points.  Okay fine dammit, and I smoked too...yeah yeah, drunk smoking.

Not a lot of people know this but something happened at one point in the night that hurt my feelings...we'll just say that I overheard something that I wish I hadn't.  I wanted to walk away and just say "whatever" but I found myself running to the first person who I thought would be nice to me and somehow that person ended up being Shiny.  Don't get me wrong...it's not that I didn't think Shiny was the awesome right out of the gate but I guess I would have expected myself to run to someone else...they were all busy or outside "making out".  Not to imply that Shiny was sloppy seconds or anything ;).

The point is that the conversation I had with Shiny led to tears and as soon as that happened, he took my hand and led me down the flight of stairs faster than anything I've ever seen.  We then proceeded to talk about tons of stuff for over an hour, I'd guess...hell if I know, time just flew by.  In that hour I learned more about myself than I had all day...it was good to just sit in the moment and be quiet after a night of being a loud mouth crazy woman who checked her shyness at the departure gate at John Wayne Airport, Terminal A.  It was great to just breathe and say some things I'd needed to tell *someone* for such a long time. 

Why this story?  Well Shiny himself opened up about being a shy introverted person on his blog post tonight and I thought I'd talk a little about what it's like to be an outgoing extrovert.  Of course there are differences but I think when it all comes down to it, we're all just looking for a quiet room, a quiet mind and someone who gets us, even if it's just for that singular moment in time. 

Tomorrow I will talk about what it's like to find women that you click with when you were pretty convinced that you were the type of chick who didn't really "do" girls (that's what Karl said).  Then later in the week, I'll talk about meeting big named bloggers and what they're really like.  Everyone else is blowing the whistle on the embarrassing antics...but I'm getting to the creamy center, one post at a time.

If you want laughs, I suggest you read through my Google Reader Shared Items, which are pretty much all the crazy hijinks of bloggers...you can go from there directly to their pages and I really suggest it.  I cannot stop laughing and peeing and laughing and peeing.

Butterfly Kisses,
Me

Lovestoned

Just like almost everyone else who just returned from TequilaCon '08, I'll do a brief little synopsis then get into it more later on.  Now you may wonder why I am pussing out and doing a mini post and why they hell I did not blog all weekend.  Well, perhaps if you read my short list of things that I do know and/or remember, that will help!

▪ Signs made for me by Karl, Avi, Britt, Becky, Poppy and Dawg that said things like "Welcome Hilly" and "We love you Hilly".

▪ The aforementioned group being my crew this whole weekend, with the addition of Shiny, starting on Saturday.  We all PPH Shiny and his "morning after" video a lot!

▪ Elbowing Avi in the crotch.

▪ Speaking of Avi....learning that *I* had the power to skeeve him out!  Me!

▪ Going to bed at 5am Saturday night/Sunday morning.

▪ Drinking 4 shots of tequila and 10 margaritas at the actual event.  Friday night's booze was 4 lemon drops, 2 tequila shots and one blue crab thing. 

▪ Showing my boobs....a lot.

▪ Losing my voice...now completely.

▪ Being completely taken by surprise in a good way.

▪ Karl's "showing of the cock" on video (you may have all heard Jester's recordings and will probably see video chez Avi).

▪ Karl doing other unmentionable things...well, they're mentionable but they are his stories to tell.

▪ Hiking around Philly with Shiny looking for a metal box with wheels.

▪ Running (ish) to the top of the "Rocky Balboa" stairs at the museum.

▪ Meeting wonderful new people who took me by storm and immediately got knighted into the circle.  (sarcasm, but there actually IS a picture).

▪ Seeing old friends, adding in the new friends and sharing in a drunken magical evening that rocked the cock.

▪ Realizing that I really can be friends with women and am now missing and adoring them very much.

I'm sure there's more but as I mentioned...yeah, the last time I went to bed it was Sunday morning at 5am and I got maybe 4 hours of sleep if that.  I am running on fumes and want to check out blogs so more to come....I know they are starting a picture pool on Flickr if you want to check it out.

Carpet Shampooer Kisses,
Hilly

Pretty Soon This Will Be In The Past....

I have a friend who's really into having these existential conversations and although sometimes it can be interesting, it's generally not.  Like earlier this week when she said, "Wow...so much hoopla over an event that will be over faster than it occurs."  I'm still not quite sure how the hell that's possible but erm, I caught her drift.  That's the thing about life though....sometimes having things to look forward to for awhile is what makes everything so damned exciting.  I've never been capable of being matter-of-fact about big trips or events and I'm okay with that!

In case you haven't heard, it's TequilaCon weekend and by the time you read this, I will be on a plane zooming from one coast to another, hopefully lost in a book or sleeping.  My flight leaves at 6:45 AM, which means that I have to get up at the ass-crack of dawn in order to get to the airport on time.  I see a lot of Starbucks in my future.  I'm hoping that the day starts off with as much peace and tranquility that I've had over the last week.  Sure, there have been moments where people have pissed me off but the really important thing that I want to talk about is that I've not been pissed off at *myself*.

That's right...I let it all go.  I decided that belaboring things that were not going to change immediately was just making it harder for me to actually change them.  Something about not seeing the forest for the trees of some such bullshit.  When I went clothes shopping the other day, it wasn't just the usual episode of me thinking over and over again that I hated myself and my body and becoming pissy because nothing looked right.  I actually had a lot of success finding cute stuff and I wonder if half of that was my attitude allowing some goodness in.  Yesterday as I sat in the pedicure chair, I wasn't annoyed, which I usually am.  I have a hard time sitting still so pedicures, although they produce a wonderful resort, are torture for me normally.  But yesterday I was thankful to be there...grateful to have a port in the storm that was my busy day and super happy to be able to clear my mind.  I realized that when I used to get them all the time, I lost appreciation for them because it was more like a chore than a treat.  In those moments I realized the biggest revelation of all....

In the last year, due to stuff with my marriage and money, I've been knocked down quite a few pegs and humbled greatly.  It's not as if I'd been some snotty ass person before but well, everything seemed easy.  However, with humbleness comes a whole new appreciation for everything taken advantage of in the past.  I love seeing thing with new eyes.  I'm happy.  Wait, who said that? 

Oh right, it was this girl from TequilaCon 2007 (please see last year's collage-y picture so you'll know what sorts of hijinks to expect this year!):

So off I go to see some of the people who make me the happiest.  Off I go to be in a place where I feel safe and truly loved.  Off I go to let my guard down and just fucking be me.  I'll see you on the flip side where I am sure some lovely crazy stories will reside.  (Oooh, I am a poet!)  Holy fuckstick, I'm excited!!!   Let's see who I can get to lick me this year.....

If you want a blow by blow (that's what she said) of events as they are unfolding, you can follow me or subscribe to the RSS feed of my Twitter.

Tequila Kisses And Lemon Drop Hugs,
Me