August 27th, 2008
I’ve been torturing Brandon over at / thepenismightier \ for almost a year and a half now about writing a guest post for me. It’s either his fault for lagging or mine for not nagging…let’s call it even! In either case, I bring to you a wonderful guest post by someone who is a helluva lot more clever than I am…
Everybody remembers their first time, well maybe not my friend Timothy who we always thought was too quiet to be Father Conrad’s favorite altarboy, anyway. You remember that excitement, that buildup, the coming goosebumps, the loss of breath, the urge to fight back tears, blood in your mouth as you bite your lip, that curious noise, what was that? you wonder, mentally running through the lyrics to Old MacDonald, the smells, the flash of light, the release. The little bit of regret responsible for the urge to cuddle. The guilt, the silence, the resentment, and the lonely walk to the bathroom to see the damage done to daddy’s little flower blossom in the harsh fluorescent lights. Ahh, yes. Everybody remembers the first time someone left a comment on their blog.
MORE PLEASE.
Of course, one just isn’t enough, because you know that despite your collection of Star Wars memorabilia, despite your fondness of wearing Crocs to your weekly Gamestop excursion, despite your debilitating addiction to Rockstar Energy Drink, all of which give you the appearance of normalcy, you are now an insatiable comment whore.
I understand, I really do. I’m not going to judge you, just as I know you won’t judge me for the following conversation I had with my comments box at the height of my obsession.
Comment Box: 1
Me: Oooh, that’s nice.
Comment Box: 2
Me: Oh, that one was me. Oops.
Comment Box: 3
Me: /muffled moaning sounds
Comment Box: 4
Me: Dirty, dirty. You know you like it.
Comment Box: 7
Me: FUCKING CHRIST GOD
Comment Box: 9
Me: OH MOMMY
Comment Box: Wait? Did you say ‘mommy’?
Me: Um.(thinkfastthinkfast).Mommy was the nickname for my last girlfriend.
(whew!)
Comment Box: The fuck? YOU DIDN’T JUST CALL ME BY YOUR EX GIRLFRIEND’S NAME!
Me: Um. (thinkfastthinkfast). You’re on the pill, right? I think the condom fell off. (condom still unwrapped on computer desk).
Comment Box: BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH
Fortunately we created a freak outlet a couple years back called the Comment Orgy. It sort of went away for awhile (THANK YOU DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY) but I am hoping to bring it back starting here, starting now, at Hilly’s place, because who really wants to clean up after an orgy at their own place? The rules are simple. Leave a comment. Eat some mango, come back and leave another. No one is going to judge you. Some of you will bring vitamin B shots, some of you will bring furry costumes, some of you will bring Bibles. That’s not weird at all.
Once we get to 100 comments, then the orgy is considered a success, Hilly tries to recover without the assistance of an enema, and then picks someone to host the next comment orgy. We all go back to our lives, our jobs, the boy scout troop where we volunteer, whatever. But secretly, we all know.
Okay, now, people.
Talk dirty.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:10 am
Chocolate, banana, peanut butter smoothies are the shiznit. So is Hilly. RAWR!! :rock
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 10:11 am
Also, Brandon, have you ever looked at your URL all together as one word? I’m sure you have.
KUDOS to me for being the FIRST commenter!!
<—the clap.
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 10:14 am
Brandon - I certainly hope your blog is called “The Penis Mightier” and not “The Pen Is Mightier” because I be sorely disappointed if it was the latter.
Oh, and I don’t like mango. Is papaya OK?
Finns last blog post..And So It Goes
August 27th, 2008 at 10:15 am
And I so left me comment before TSM’s second comment posted.
I did too!
Finns last blog post..And So It Goes
August 27th, 2008 at 10:16 am
Wait, am I allowed to self-satisfy during my own orgy or do I just keep my mouth shut?
I mean, I think me with an open mouth is more productive to um…release.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:17 am
I picked the wrong week to give up drinking…penicillin.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:19 am
my goodness, my web address DOES look kind of suspicious. i think this might explain all that cialis spam.
partly. ahem.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:20 am
I’ve never had 100 comments before. It would make me hot to see that big of a number in my inbox.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:21 am
oh, btw, hilly, it’s been a long time since some of us have participated in one of these things, so i brought some pilates mats and a couple tubes of ben gay.
and no, i’m not sure how the nurse costume got in there.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:24 am
Mango is gross, but I am going for ice cream in a bit. I’ll be back because I am determined to get my name up on the comment whore thing again!
radioactive toris last blog post..Surprise
August 27th, 2008 at 10:25 am
Oh, man. Had I known there would be a comment orgy today I’d have worn my fancy underwear instead of the Little Mermaid jobbies with the hole on the Tim Lahaye. (That’s an obscure joke. Tim Lahaye is a religious writer who wrote a book called “Left Behind.” Get it?)
Okay, now for the orgy cry:
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Hello, Hilly and Brando.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:27 am
Mud, mud, mud. Was that dirty enough for you? Ahhh. I feel rather satisfied now. I need a Monster to get ready for round 2. Fuck Rockstar.
Winters last blog post..Trippin’
August 27th, 2008 at 10:28 am
I guess it was unfair of me to judge mango like that. Just because I do not care for it does not mean it is gross.
radioactive toris last blog post..Surprise
August 27th, 2008 at 10:28 am
Oh, sorry! I meant to capitalize Mango. Mango is someone I met recently on Craig’s list.
And come back soon! Orgies are like garage sales. The diehards get there early but all the really good…
okay, i’m going stop what was about to become the worst orgy analogy ever.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:28 am
Comment orgy? count me in. i shall bring the leather straps and the sanitary hand wires.
Iron Fists last blog post..time enough
August 27th, 2008 at 10:28 am
Ha, Tim Lahaye. I actually got it. Even before the explanation.
Now, let me go mix cocktails. Every good orgy needs them.
:sleep:
August 27th, 2008 at 10:29 am
But either way, I am on my way out the door to get ice cream now.
radioactive toris last blog post..Surprise
August 27th, 2008 at 10:29 am
Hand wires? Not wipes?
Hrm, you may be as exciting as I think you are after all, Sexypants.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:33 am
Vahid, it’s an orgy, not airport screening, silly!
August 27th, 2008 at 10:34 am
I wish this were my orgy face:
But I’m afraid it’s actually this:
(I have no idea if these emoticons get rendered in email and such. If so, I guess you had to be there.)
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 10:36 am
You wish to twitch but you actually cry. Uh, that’s what my email says anyway and as we all know, email never lies.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:36 am
This is MY orgy face:
August 27th, 2008 at 10:38 am
Hilly, I don’t know…is your in “box” big enough to hold that much love?
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 10:39 am
By the way: I still have two thongs, half a bra and a pair of snowshoes from the comment orgy at my place several months ago, in case anyone is missing these things.
Just FYI.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 10:39 am
This is my orgy face: :rock
The hand, however, is usually slightly lower…
August 27th, 2008 at 10:41 am
Ah, comment orgy! How I have missed YOU.
Boner!
August 27th, 2008 at 10:42 am
Shiny just made me have a mini orgasm. Haha, and I laughed. Hrm.
And yes, my box is big enough to handle all kinds of love. You have no idea.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:43 am
I wonder if any random words automatically become an emoticon in this place. Let’s test:
:boobs:
Now, submit…
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 10:43 am
I don’t even know what I would do with 100 comments. Probably cry or something equally girly.
:rock
Princess of the Universes last blog post..Dear John Black,
August 27th, 2008 at 10:43 am
Damn.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 10:45 am
Oh yeah, and I don’t really like mango. But I do have an apple fruit cup. I hope that’s OK.
Princess of the Universes last blog post..Dear John Black,
August 27th, 2008 at 10:45 am
Hundreds of comments per post sounds like a lot of fun, I know. In truth, however, it gets old after a few years. Trust me.
That’s why I make a concerted effort these days not to be very interesting. I just can’t handle the traffic that will result if I lose focus.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:46 am
unrelated: leaving comments with a cell phone is hard as fuck. ugh. can’t wait till I get home so I can fully participate. nothing worse than half-assing it at an orgy.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:47 am
Oh, what a good idea!!! A comment orgy - I’m up for any kind of orgy actually!
And also? This
is my “o” face. LOL
August 27th, 2008 at 10:50 am
I’m still wondering what happened to his friend, Timothy. Seriously, he must have made that up. Timothy? I’ve never actually met anyone who called themselves Timothy. It is always Tim. Even the kid in Lassie was Timmy, right? Never Timothy. I don’t believe he ever had a friend named Timothy. Liar.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:50 am
I just hope no one’s orgy face is:
:theclap:
HA!
Also this: I don’t believe for one minute that IronFist has trouble typing online with one hand. I bet he’s a master at it. (How do you think he developed those fists of iron, after all?)
August 27th, 2008 at 10:53 am
i don’t really have an orgy face, but i have been working out -
[.|.]
i hope someone remembered the coconut butter.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:54 am
Let’s see…half-assing an orgy? That could be a euphamism for something really naughty. Just relax. You’ll feel a little pressure…
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 10:55 am
neil, i would never lie at an orgy. lying is immoral.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:58 am
I just hope someone brings something sticky and delicious. I’m in that kind of mood…for now.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:58 am
I’m thinking morality isn’t the highest priority at this particular orgy…
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 11:00 am
You’re in luck, Hilly! I just went school shopping for the kids and happen to have an extra tube of Elmer’s glue!
What?
August 27th, 2008 at 11:01 am
What’s wrong with immorality at an orgy? I think orgies should live forever.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:01 am
i don’t know what in feck i’m doing here. it’s brandon’s fault. he sent me here via Twitter.
(S)wines last blog post..Denver, Day 2
August 27th, 2008 at 11:03 am
It’s okay (S)wine. Don’t feel self-conscious. If if makes you feel better, NONE of us know what you’re doing here.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:04 am
FIRTS!
Oh, crap.
AuntMarvels last blog post..Text Messages Saved On My Phone
August 27th, 2008 at 11:05 am
Back in high school I organized an orgy and you know what, everyone who said they’d come (heh) flaked out. I was left with a huge roll of plastic and two cases of Reddi-whip whipped cream cannisters, which I hereby bequeath to this orgy.
Oh, look there’s whipped cream down your shirt, let me get that.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:07 am
I’m totally sending Hilly a container of Xscream buttercream frosting flavor. Sweet and delicious, and STIMULATING as well!
oh hell. i think it’s time to break out the toys.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:08 am
I said, “what what, in the butt?”.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:10 am
Speaking of one hand, I’m not sure who’s hand that is. Please stop poking me there.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:11 am
No no no…the lotion doesn’t go in the butt. That would burn.
The toys go in the butt. With much lube.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:12 am
Iron Fist-what’s wrong? You not comfortable enough with your sexuality for a little back door action?
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 11:13 am
I’ve never had anyone come into my backdoor. Erm, that was so not supposed to sound as dirty as it did but whatever…
August 27th, 2008 at 11:13 am
People. People. This is the Internet. It’s no place for dirty talk. Now be nice and let’s all enjoy the orgy.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:14 am
Is someone groping vahid’s Tim Lahaye?
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:15 am
Isn’t it like baseball season or something?
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 11:15 am
Ooops, that would be me! I thought it was his Herman Mellville.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:18 am
What do you mean you aren’t at 100 yet. I get all excited when I hit 10. 100, that’s something.
Nats last blog post..Coffee
August 27th, 2008 at 11:19 am
If you don’t know a Tim Lahaye from a Herman Melville, maybe you should stick with Dr. Seuss.
(And no, that’s NOT a Wocket in my Pocket.)
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:19 am
My back door is sliding…
Nats last blog post..Coffee
August 27th, 2008 at 11:20 am
wait, i have to talk dirty? ’cause i’m kind of shy.
Cryss last blog post..Awesome = Not So Awesome
August 27th, 2008 at 11:21 am
Cryss: You don’t have to talk dirty if you don’t want to. It’s a free world. You can choose to be unpopular.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:23 am
Crys, someone around here needs to be pure. I nominate you.
(Certainly not Scott, Brandon or Vahid!)
August 27th, 2008 at 11:24 am
I’m confused. I’m supposed to masturbate onto my keyboard?
Again?
Avitables last blog post..Remember that movie Major League?
August 27th, 2008 at 11:25 am
Or is this a hot commenter competition? Can I whore myself out to be named the hottest commenter?
Avitables last blog post..Remember that movie Major League?
August 27th, 2008 at 11:26 am
I should try the comment orgy Though, I’d lower my success number down to around five since that’s about all I would expect to come to an orgy with me.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:27 am
Sure, why not? Everyone else is whoring themselves out everywhere else.
Ahem.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:29 am
I’m not whoring! I’m just making sure everyone gets a taste. That’s philanthropy.
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 11:30 am
It’s not the size of your orgy, other-Brandon. It’s what you do with it.
Also it IS the size, to be honest. Just ask any of the chicks here.
(Except Crys. She’s shy.)
August 27th, 2008 at 11:35 am
Hey, I’m pure! You and Crys grab that cup and meet me in the bathroom and I’ll prove it!
August 27th, 2008 at 11:36 am
Ok. There’s orgy and there’s sperm donation. I think that’s a line better not crossed here, don’t you?
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 11:39 am
I’m hungry. All that mango and papaya talk isn’t helping. Must go raid the kitchen now.
I think I may have gotten 15 or 20 comments on one of my posts once. I was so giddy I didn’t know what to do with myself!
angies last blog post..10 on Tuesday
August 27th, 2008 at 11:40 am
I think the most I ever had at once was 6. I was exhausted afterwards.
COMMENTS you dirty people! COMMENTS!!
TSMs last blog post..Talk To Me When You Hit 35…
August 27th, 2008 at 11:42 am
I have my ice cream now and am trying to catch up on what I missed. Apparently I missed a lot!
radioactive toris last blog post..Surprise
August 27th, 2008 at 11:43 am
Is it supposed to hurt the first time? Or is that guy(?) in the koala-bear furry suit doing it wrong?
August 27th, 2008 at 11:45 am
1. That’s not a guy, it’s an actual koala bear.
2. If it hurts you probably have herpes.
Sorry.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:47 am
Does it have to stop at 100? I’m never very good at following the rules, yanno.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:49 am
I’ve been hanging out around Brandon’s place, of course I have herpes. All the cool kids have herpes.
I’m glad to know it’s a real Koala bear though, because I was afraid to mention it smells a little… funny.
I think he’s done ravishing me, anyone else for a little hot ‘mouse action?
August 27th, 2008 at 11:49 am
Well, that’s what you get for fucking around with Microsoft. Expect no sympathy from me.
But, then again, I am a Certified Mac Whore, so it’s not like this is entirely unexpected.
Dave2s last blog post..Dieting
August 27th, 2008 at 11:50 am
This is the third best orgy I’ve ever been to.
Avitables last blog post..Remember that movie Major League?
August 27th, 2008 at 11:50 am
100? No, you don’t have to stop at 100. You do, however, have to stop at 318. That’s very important to me.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:52 am
no, hilly, it doesn’t have to stop. not until the last person sighs his final breath.
and even then it doesn’t have to stop, but you know, we try to run a dignified orgy.
(i think we saw 300 comments once, but i was blind for a week after)
August 27th, 2008 at 11:52 am
as long as it’s a titmouse!
August 27th, 2008 at 11:53 am
Your orgy ate my comment.
Miss Britts last blog post..12 Reasons I Should Pose Nude
August 27th, 2008 at 11:53 am
dirty, hm. ok. i could talk about curves of neck but nobody would think that’s dirty. you guys are asking for porn dirty. i can’t TALK porn dirty.
well wait, i’ll try.
a couple more minutes
Cryss last blog post..Awesome = Not So Awesome
August 27th, 2008 at 11:54 am
wow, my first comment got eaten. what the hell, THIS DEFEATS PURPOSES
Cryss last blog post..Awesome = Not So Awesome
August 27th, 2008 at 11:55 am
well actually, if my porn words will ultimately get arbitrarily deleted, maybe i SHOULD just come right out and speak them here…
hold plz
Cryss last blog post..Awesome = Not So Awesome
August 27th, 2008 at 11:57 am
Wait. There are words in porn? Really? Hmmm… I’ll have to pay more attention.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 11:57 am
i don’t know who keeps eating the comments, but whoever it is, i’d like to say : YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG
August 27th, 2008 at 11:58 am
I want to be #100. But that’ll be hard on a cell phone.
Brandons last blog post..From the DWP! Archives: Yahoo Can Blow Me
August 27th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
Crys, I have a serious clavicle fetish, so, assuming you’re female, or male and not too hairy on the neckline, meet me in Hilly’s bedroom in two minutes.
August 27th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
“Clavicle” is the new porn word.
Move over, “cock!”
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
It’s not me eating the comments. I’m eating other things. Ahem.
(also, I checked SPAM and no one was in there being naughty either…wtf?)
August 27th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
wait, you have a naughty filter at a comment orgy? doesn’t that make it kind of hard?
August 27th, 2008 at 12:06 pm
No you see, this dude who is hot for me is not letting everyone in to do me. I mean, hi…jealous much?
August 27th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
I don’t know about the rest of you, but I feel about 96/100ths of the way to a commentgasm. Keep rubbing.
August 27th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
So, just to be clear, is everyone else just sitting at work or home, alone, fully dressed, doing this? The rest of you aren’t actually together and naked, are you? If so, I really feel like I’m not getting the full experience.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
My blog feels…so close. This is as close at it’s ever gotten before. In fact, it’s moaning…
August 27th, 2008 at 12:09 pm
It’s a race to 100 now! :rock
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 12:09 pm
Did I get it?!!
August 27th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
YEAH, BABY! WHO’S YOUR DADDY?
August 27th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
I said whut whut, in your butt (and I’m picking my mangoes with a stalk on !!!) Deb
August 27th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
someone around here is a whore
August 27th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
Scott, you’re at home or work and alone and dressed? I thought you were in Hilly’s computer room down the hall. We’re all here and naked and having a good time. Condolances.
August 27th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
Hilly: I know! Someone here IS totally a whore. I won’t name names, though. We all know who I’m talking about.
‘mouse: I KNEW IT!
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 12:16 pm
Man! I’m always late to the good parties! Now there’s nothing but a bunch of half-naked people staring at each other awkwardly and checking their watches.
jennys last blog post..Licked
August 27th, 2008 at 12:16 pm
hahaha somebody around here is a statement slattern
August 27th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
y’know Scott, I’m really enjoying this little post-release cuddle with you. For some reason I’d never actually managed to follow a link back to your blog despite seeing your comments everywhere, like, forever. So, after having shared some time with you at this orgy, I guess I should really say, Hello, Scott.
August 27th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
:::running in, toys in hand:::
Am I too late????
Helloooooooo…
Dammit.
Stephanies last blog post..Life changes on a dime.
August 27th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
Sephanie, describe the toys, please.
300-or-bust!
August 27th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
Hello, ‘mouse.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 12:23 pm
HEALTH REMINDER: Orgy guests, please remember to wash your hands when moving from the main orgy to the buffet. Also please wash your hands before rejoining the orgy. REMEMBER: Nobody likes to get goosed when you’ve got buffalo wing sauce on your fingers!
August 27th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
mmmmmmmmmm, mango.
anyone else wanna slap their ass and pretend that they are on saturday night live?
hello haha narfs last blog post..Encouraging
August 27th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
Mmmmmmmmmmmmm buffalo wings. Can you get listeriosis from those?
Nats last blog post..Coffee
August 27th, 2008 at 12:33 pm
@Nat: I think they generally come with blue cheese.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
No one is too late. Those who had their release can eat a snack then come back.
Some of us don’t NEED a break. Some of us are just that fucking good.
August 27th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
@scott the wings, the goose or the listeria?
Nats last blog post..Coffee
August 27th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
MAN, THIS IS GREAT AND HOTT AND OOOOOoohhhh, crap. That’s um…listen, that doesn’t normally happen and, uh….
Vahid, can I borrow a couple of those wipes? Maybe six?
August 27th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
wow, what a terrific orgy! i need to go pick my kids up from school, but i’ll be right back. do you have nickelodeon or maybe some coloring books?
yikes. that was an unexpected childhood flashback. i think maybe i’ll just go rock back and forth quietly in the corner for a few.
brandons last blog post../ COMMENT ORGY
August 27th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
Sir, in a few minutes, I accidentally made a mess on the carpet I’m trying to clean up. All this orgy action is a little difficult if you’re trying to hold a glass of whine the whole time.
August 27th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
@Nat: Can’t it be all three? Blue cheese is very versatile.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
Crap. That was supposed to be ‘wine.’ Who whines at an orgy?
August 27th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
No, no, keep your blindfold on. It’s for the best.
August 27th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
@IronFist: Would you like some cool wHip with your wHine?
(Why are you pronouncing it like that?)
What? I’m just saying cool wHip?
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 12:57 pm
cool wHip?
And here I am, only bringing chocolate sauce and a six pack of classy champale to the orgy!
August 27th, 2008 at 12:58 pm
Also? We need some super spicy queso.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
If we’re doing super spicy queso I’d like to reiterate Vahid’s hand-washing request. Habanero blisters on the glans are not fun. Trust me.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
Queso is not a good lubricant, generally speaking, and there’s nothing sexy about being scalded with hot cheese. Again, speaking in generalities there.
It’s also a bitch to get out of carpets (translate ‘carpets’ as you wish in this context).
August 27th, 2008 at 1:05 pm
omg, you ARE a real redhead! I mean, that’s cool, but I’m out five bucks in the orgy betting pool.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
Real redhead? Double-check, dude. As Sir pointed out, it may just be queso in the carpet.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 1:12 pm
omg, are you seriously telling me that my comment with all the porn words REALLY DID SERIOUSLY get deleted?
oh that’s rich! that’s spectacular!
not as spectacular as the comment itself, mind you. HOOOO BABY, did somebody say clavicle?
Cryss last blog post..Awesome = Not So Awesome
August 27th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
(pee ess, i bet lots of people whine at orgies. that’s just a guess. totally unsubstantiated and untested because how the hell would i know? but i mean…)
Cryss last blog post..Awesome = Not So Awesome
August 27th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
If he was talking about me, it has to be queso. I mean, there’s no real way to tell if my carpet matches my drapes!
Normally TMI. On comment orgy day, not so much. Erm, I think.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
Of course, he could have been talking about one of you guys. It’s just not that easy not to eyeball the candy when it is all up in your face.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
Look, I know we’re not supposed to discuss politics at orgies, but seriously, what do you think of Obama’s choice of running mate? Don’t worry, I’ll still respect you no matter what you say. Move your leg over here, please.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
My only reservation about Biden… hold on…
a little to the left. okay. and forward a little. okay. now arch. okay…
So, anyway, Obama/Biden just looks like they’re slowly trying to spell out Osama Bin Laden. B to S. Slip a little “n La” in there. I’m just sayin’ that’s all.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:22 pm
I need to take a break and eat something.
Any suggestions?
August 27th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
I recommend the wieners.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
I think he smells funny and needs a shave, much like the 70s thatch on that afro-tastic crotch being sported by that dude in the corner.
You can call me, ‘Sir’s last blog post..This and That: Part Deux
August 27th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
hey iron fist, DID SOMEBODY SAY MATE?
get it? because mate also means to have sex?
August 27th, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Hey, Brandon: Obama and Biden are both currently in Congress. Get it? Congress?
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
w00t! Orgy with Hilly!
Chriss last blog post..Random nonesense
August 27th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
Holy hell I just got here and I’ve missed most of the action! I always sucked at orgies.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:40 pm
@Steph: Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself. Orgies need people who suck.
scotts last blog post..The Protocol Post
August 27th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
Scott, you put the “oomph” back in “n La”.
Oh, and hello, Scott. (Can’t believe I’ve been at an orgy this long and forgot to say hello. Rude of me. Tsk tsk.)
August 27th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
Danggit… late for the orgy. That’s just my luck. As penance, I’ll lift my shirt: (.)(.